Youngest of three, I started watching the world and thinking about how to “optimize” at a very early age. I think I was six before I realized that I was two years younger than my sister and three and a half years younger than my brother. Up until then, I just assumed that we were all equal and to keep up, I needed to be better at thinking ahead, noticing what was unspoken, asking better questions and looking for life hacks -- before “life hacking” was a thing. Of course back then, it was more about not being left behind than it was about optimizing my performance...but you get the gist.
My father was an educator turn environmentalist who believed I was capable of anything. He nurtured my ability to dream, BIG, and consistently challenged me to be my best self. Each summer, I spent countless hours unplugged from the outer world - running through the woods of New Hampshire barefoot and on extended family hiking trips. Starting when I was 5, Dad asked great questions; Instead of “What do you want to be when you grow up,” he probed deeper: “What will your legacy be?” and “How will you leave a positive impact on the world around you?”
And figuring out my best self has taken time and patience, and I believe it's a lifelong journey. Figuring out your best self necessitates exploring all your options and falling on your face at times (which I've done more than once!). Here are a few job options I’ve held along that journey:
- Limousine driver in Boston
- Social worker, responsible for socializing crack addicted babies
- Elderly caretaker
- Cattle rancher on a Texas Long Horn Cattle Ranch
- Backpacking trip leader in Yellowstone and the Tetons
- State department employee, doing Refugee Resettlement in Africa
- Cocktail waitress
- Capitol Hill federal policy employee
- Change management consultant for Police Executives
As you can see, there were a lot of different experiences, and few that presented a clear, compelling theme forward. I’m now asking myself, “How can I be the best mother, a better partner, and an encouraging coach?" Everyone deserves someone in their life who believes that they are capable of anything. This is one of the many things I love about coaching.
A mentor of mine says that all your passion lies outside your comfort zone. You might enjoy things that come easily to you, but passion exists in those things that inspire greatness from you. Those things that push you beyond your own conception of what you can do, what is possible. The deeper I have to dig within myself, the more engaged, passionate and inspired I begin.
Completing my dissertation on Policing Domestic Violence necessitated hard work to execute and significant “passion” to convince both my academic committee to allow this and the police departments to collect this data. Winning the APA's International Best Dissertation of the year award solidified my commitment to consistently pursue passion.
I spent years finding a life partner who was committed to living an outstanding life - personally, professionally… And I appreciate that what truly creates an outstanding life partnership is a constant commitment to re-engage, reconnect, refocus and re-develop. (click through to linkedin blog)
Writing Rewired meant putting my ideas and beliefs permanently out in the world, on paper to be judged. Hearing from stakeholders about how this has shifted their lives, changed their marriages and altered the way they parent, reaffirms my commitment to be bold and trust my inner intuition. (click through to buy book / get free ebook that collects names)
Conceiving my son and then my daughter after a long struggle with infertility solidified my understanding about the power of persistence, diligence, and creativity in the face of adversity. Never had I wanted something so much, worked so hard, or suffered so much heartbreak, failure and disappointment than in that journey.
Said most simply, I now help people to be the very best version of themselves - at work, at home, in regards to their health and in their relationships. I work with people to clarify their goals, and help them get there. One day, I hope to help you reach yours.
I look forward to connecting with you,